Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Mommy Confessions Tuesday

I confess that I hide behind the pantry door to eat shit so my toddler will not see me! 

*short pause for judgment*

Yes, you read that right. I am a closet eater. Whew! It feels good saying it. Fruity pebbles, Coco puffs, Chips, Popcorn, even if it is for one small taste, I hide. I hide because once she sees it, it is all over. 

Mainly, I offer my daughter a variety of healthy foods. For breakfast, we usually have oatmeal, green smoothies, fruit and yogurt, or the occasional pancakes or waffles. For lunch, we have some variety of hummus, whole grain crackers or pretzels, fruit and veggies, nuts, or things like that. I don't typically offer my daughter many snacks. She is not a big eater and she is extremely PICKY so I try to limit her snacks to ensure that she will at least be hungry enough to try and eat our healthy meal. 

You see, one small snack and she falls off the bandwagon. She goes bonkers. She will repeatedly open my pantry door and pull out everything and anything she can find.... and it is usually what little junk I have. How the hell does she know? For real, she has never had a Coco Puff in her life. She has never seen the box. How does she manage to go in my pantry and pull out the hidden box of Coco Puffs? She doesn't even know what they are!??!

"Bowl Mommy," she will say holding a box of some forbidden goodie. "Big Bowl Mommy," as if the teeny tiny take-and-toss container I got out isn't big enough for her little 25 pound self. 

So you see, this is why I hide. I hide and stuff food in my mouth before she sees me...before she sees it and where I am keeping it because if she sees me, it is all over. With a sly grin, she will pounce on me at warp speed. 

So there you have it. Now, I am off to read some other Mommy Confessions liked up with Megan and Heather. Thanks ladies!


  1. Love it! I'm right there with you!!! I've been known to eat a whole bag of twizzlers while I "step into the other room." Ha!

  2. I LOOOOVE this post. My kid is a popcorn fiend, and I hide when I eat it. She goes nuts for it.
    I loved reading your confession! Hopefully you will continue linking with us on Tuesdays! :)

    Megan @ thememoirsofmegan.com

  3. LOL. I do this very same thing. For me, it's baked cheetos. And if the kids see them, they go CRAZY. Can't happen and I don't want the drama, so I've been known to hide in the pantry a time or two. Or six. Whatever :)

  4. Swinging by from yesterday's link-up... This post made me giggle because I am all too guilty of this myself. Isn't it just awful? haha, but no worries. ;)

  5. Hahahaha is your child, my child in disguise? Ben is the same way! So, I sneak food often too! If he sees someone eating something, he HAS to have it. He chased my mom around the kitchen once, signing, "More!" repeatedly, because she had chocolate cake. Hilarious. And I have no idea how these kids know what junk food is, and how they become obsessed with it even when they don't know what it is.

    Thanks for linking up with us! :)